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Popcorn in bed! Some of my favorite mom moments are the simplest moments like these!
These shorts are so soft and love the ruching detail (they also come in this sweats version too). I also got this retro bralette and bottoms set. Their cotton bra and underwear are some of my favorites!
Adding another one to the family, there’s always a fear of not being good enough or falling short in some way, wondering how Beckam will adjust not being the baby anymore, and about a million other thoughts! But I think one thing I’ve learned is that most of the time I create these things in my head and worry about things that often never happen haha. Anyone else? Being a mom, a good mom, was something I’ve looked forward to since I was a little girl. And I know there are days I nail it and I can tell my kids feel so loved, and other days I know I’m falling short, but the biggest thing I’ve realized is how much my attitude as a mom can affect the whole family! So I wanted to share 10 habits I’ve found help me to be a better, happier mom:
It’s so important to be mindful of everything you have to be grateful for! Whether it’s expressing gratitude to your kids, your spouse, or even just consciously acknowledging or writing out everything you have to be thankful for, it will help you focus more on the positive versus the negative.
There is no perfect way to be pregnant or to be a perfect mom. What works for your neighbor may not work for you, and that’s ok! Be open-minded to other people’s perspectives and way of doing things. and be okay if things aren’t always perfectly put together. Putting unrealistic expectations on yourself for what needs to be done, or how your kids should act or what they should be achieving just sets you up for stress.
Not comparing yourself.
In that same vein, they say comparison is the death of joy and it couldn’t be truer about motherhood! There will always be moms who might be more organized than you, a better cook, etc. Instead of comparing yourself to see how you stack up, focus on yourself and your goals. You are your own benchmark! Praise yourself for the things you’re good at, whether it’s just mentally or actually saying it out loud.
The more pregnant I get, the harder it’s been to stick to a regular exercise routine, but staying active is just as important for the body as it is for the mind! Find some type of exercise you enjoy and make it part of your daily routine. Right now, swimming laps is my favorite form of exercise – not only is it a great way to beat the heat, it’s also a lifesaver in alleviating the restless leg syndrome I’ve had this pregnancy.
Focusing on the positive.
During another sleepless night last week, I listened to a motivational speaker and loved what they said about focusing on positive, empowering thoughts. It’s all about confirmation bias – your mind will automatically search for information or experiences that reinforce your beliefs. So if you tell yourself your are failing as a bad mom, your mind will always pick out those experiences to reinforce that belief and disregard anything that disproves it. This applies to everyone, in every stage of life. It’s so important to focus on the positive and things that can empower you as a person! Reflect on your thoughts… are you choosing ones that empower you?
Knowing when to ask for help.
There are always going to be days that are stressful and overwhelming – don’t be afraid to ask for help! You’ll start to identify triggers or signs that you are running out of steam, so before you feel completely drained, enlist help. Have your kids go to the neighbor’s house to play for an hour or get someone to help you come tackle a cleaning day. And get creative! It doesn’t always have to involve spending money. You can trade off with neighborhood moms or find creative ways to get an hour to ‘refill your cup’ without hiring a babysitter.
Being open with other moms.
I was talking to my friend the other day who I look to as a great mom. She’s a stay at home mom and always does a great job planning stuff for her kids. She was saying that sometimes she feels she doesn’t have the creativity to sit and play pretend dolls for long periods of time, and after 5-10 minutes she catches her mind thinking about other things. I have that same problem, and hearing someone I look to as a great mom say the same made me feel better. I thought it was just me! Being open with other moms about your struggles or on the flip side, fun things you do with your kids, will create a space for advice and learning – and you can only improve from learning from others!
Making time for yourself.
Obviously you love your kids, but make sure you are getting time away to nurture yourself too. I love going out to get a mani/pedi, going to dinner with a friend after the kids go to bed, or just going shopping. Target is always my happy place – I could wander the aisles forever! Or for some ‘you’ time at home, get the kids riled up for a wrestling match with dad to get some of their energy out. It’s literally Wes and B’s favorite thing to do! Whatever it is, just make sure you are regularly carving out some time for yourself to do something you love so that you don’t lose yourself in your role of ‘mom’.
One of my best friends is so good at sending me notes reminding me I’m a great mom, and honestly they MAKE MY DAY. Take a moment to lift other moms up around you and let them know something you appreciate or admire about them. Have you ever noticed that the more you focus on helping or encouraging other, the more joy it brings to your life in general? Not that that’s the reason you should do it 😉 but you know what I’m say. 🙂
Knowing that you are an amazing mom.
There will be days you have mom guilt or feel burnt out, but it’s important to remember how much you do and focus on the ways you are succeeding. Especially when they are young, kids look up to you like their hero and all they want to do is hang out with you. So cut yourself some slack and realize you are doing a GREAT job!
Do you guys have any other habits of happy moms you’ve learned? Let me know below in comments! You can also see more of my posts on motherhood and life of moms here.